The 10 Thinking Mistakes That Will Ruin Your Life

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 KEY POINTS: 

  1. Watch over your heart with all diligence, For from it flow the springs of life.[Be deliberate and intentional to decide and choose the quality of thoughts you think, because your external reality is shaped by your thoughts]
  2. For as a man thinketh in his heart so does he become. [You can proactively decide the life you want to live in reality in terms of your talks and actions, by choosing what to think about]
  3. Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaketh. [Your talks, and actions are an overflow of what your heart is full of.]


Thinking mistakes (Cognitive distortions)  are unintentionally erroneous and adversely biased methods of thinking in reaction to adversity. Cognitive distortions frequently develop over time. Researchers have found at least ten different types of flawed thinking processes.

We're all prone to making mistakes in our thinking. These ten categories, based on David Burns' book Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy, categorize the most prevalent thinking mistakes.

In this article, we shall look at each of the 10Thinking Mistakes you could be practicing much to your chagrin.

01. All-or-Nothing Thinking-This is the tendency to perceive things in black and white. In the workplace, for instance, you group your co-workers into either good or bad. In life endeavors, you consider your efforts to result either in success or failure. In marriage, your partner is either good or bad. In parenting your child is either stubborn or compliant. Your thinking is in terms of two extremes only, instead of noticing some shades of grey.

Reflection: What are some of the ways have you been practicing "All Or Nothing Thinking" You can Live to Chat Me @ Inside Out Live Chat -Facebook messenger

02-Overgeneralizing-This is a  cognitive distortion in which an individual views a single event as an invariable rule according to the APA Dictionary of psychology.  So that, for example, failure at accomplishing one task will predict an endless pattern of defeat in all tasksIt's all too simple to take a single occurrence and extrapolate its implications to other circumstances. If you don't finish a deal, you could conclude, "I'm not good at closing deals." If one of your coworkers treats you badly, you could conclude, "People in this industry aren't pleasant."

Reflection: Looking back and present what are some of the ways have you practiced Overgeneralization unconsciously?[You can join my live chat @Inside Out Live Chat] we explore some of the ways you have overgeneralized much to your self-defeat and sabotage.

03-Filtering Out the Positive-According to cogbtherapy.comNegative Filtering is a common cognitive distortion, and most of us do it from time to time. Simply, it is filtering out all of the positive information about a specific situation, and only allowing in the negative information.

When nine nice things happen and one negative thing happens, we tend to ignore the good and focus on the bad. Perhaps we say that we had a horrible day despite the pleasant events that transpired, or we assess our performance and declare that it was poor because we made a single error. Filtering out the positive might make it difficult to develop a genuine perspective on a situation. 

Developing a balanced attitude necessitates taking note of both the positive and unpleasant aspects of life.

Reflection: What are some of the ways have you been filtering the positive to focus on the negatives in your life experiences? [if you would like a listening ear and attentive heart, live to chat me @Inside Out Live Chat.


4. Mind-Reading-In essence we accept our incapacity to really know what other people are thinking. Yet that doesn’t ward us from sometimes supposing we are privy to what must be going on in others' minds. When we think things like that, “We're creating assumptions that aren't always founded on fact, For example  when we say, "He must have thought I was foolish during the meeting." What this thinking mistake does is influence antisocial behaviors in us which in the long run ruin our relationships and sometimes our careers.

Reflection: Think of any instance you have supposed to read what your spouse, parent, teacher, boss, friend, or colleague was thinking about you or about your situation and how it affected your relationship with them.


5. Catastrophizing-According to healthline.com, Catastrophizing is when someone assumes that the worst will happen. Often, it involves believing that you're in a worse situation than you really are or exaggerating the difficulties you face. For example, someone might worry that they'll fail an exam. 

We have a tendency to overestimate the severity of situations. Though you don't reach your financial objectives one month, you could say to yourself, "I'm going to go bankrupt," or "I'll never be able to retire," even if there's no indication that the situation is really that terrible. Once your thoughts turn negative, it's easy to get caught up in catastrophizing the issue.

Reflection: What are some of the instances have you caught yourself Catastrophizing and how negatively did impact your life?

[From my experience working with a number of individuals suffering from emotional sickness, emotional healing begins as soon as there is flow and motion of thoughts and emotions from the hurting soul to a caring, listening heart. In that connection, I offer free live chat to get my clients started in the healing journey. To participate go to Inside Out Live Chat

6. Emotional Reasoning-Certainly our emotions aren't based on truth, yet we often mistakenly believe they are. If you're anxious about changing jobs you could think, "If I'm this afraid of it, I shouldn't change jobs." Alternatively, you could think, "If I feel like a loser, I must be a loser." It's critical to understand that emotions, like thoughts, aren't necessarily grounded in reality. The best practice is always to accept your emotions as real-time internal reactions to external stimuli but not necessarily accept their suggestions without thorough consideration.

Reflection:-In the past week, how have you allowed your emotions to run your talks and actions? what impact did that have on the relationship?


7. Labeling-Labeling is the process of giving something a name. Rather than thinking, "He made a mistake," you could think, "He's an idiot." People and experiences are placed into categories when they are labeled. These classifications are frequently based on single instances rather than a holistic evaluation of them all.

Reflection:-Have you found yourself labeling your spouse, your child, your colleague, friend, or boss? What effect has it had on your relationship with them?

8. Fortune-telling-We like to try our hand at fortunetelling even though none of us knows what will happen in the future. "I'm going to disgrace myself tomorrow," or "If I established a business, it would collapse within the first year," are common thoughts. If you're not cautious, these kinds of beliefs might become a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Reflection: Do you remember an instance where you attempted to fortune tell? how did it go in terms of your relationship with them?


9. Personalization-As much as we would like to believe that the world does not revolve around ourselves, it is all too simple to personalize everything. You could assume that if someone doesn't call back, "She must be furious with me," or that if a coworker is cranky, "He doesn't like me."

Reflection: How have you personalized conflicts in your interactions with your spouse, parent, child, teacher, or friend?

10. Unreal Ideal-Making unjust comparisons between ourselves and others might deplete our motivation. It's not beneficial to look at someone who has achieved great success and assume, "I should have been able to accomplish that," especially if that person received some fortunate breaks or competitive advantages along the way.

Reflection: How have you practiced this in the recent past in your family and work relationships?


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