10 Qualities Fearful Avoidants Find Attractive


There are three major factors that create Attraction at the subconscious level. At a very high level they are:

Personal Repressed Traits-They is the traits that somebody is expressing that we may be repressing or not owning or honoring within ourselves. They will also be the 

Unmet Needs That We Have. If somebody comes and meets them, that's quite attractive feeling for many individuals. And last but not least things that represent the;

Subconscious comfort zone in the relationship we have to ourselves. So Often we're attracted to people who treat us in a similar way that we treat Ourselves In the internal relationship we have to ourselves at a subconscious level.

 So what does that mean for fearful avoidance specifically? Well, the number one traits that are majorly repressed within fearful Avoidance that they tend to be quite attracted to other people are assertiveness, confidence, or feelings of deep worthiness.

So, people who feel this, I hear this Lot from people who are fearful-avoidant “oh wow this Person like they have so many imperfections but they Just they treat themselves like they matter.

They don't hide their flaws they're so comfortable with themselves in their flaws. And that's such an attractive quality; I hear that from fearful avoidance a lot historically over the years.

 Obviously, assertiveness is demonstrated by people with Good boundaries people who are confident. People who are ok speaking up and stating their minds and their opinion about things that are violating their boundaries.

 Groundedness because sometimes fearful voices can be a little bit flighty and to a certain degree at a subconscious level fearful avoidants can be sometimes attracted to selfishness in other people.

 Like a healthy amount of, because essentially it's somebody who's like willing and able to take them into consideration when making decisions Choices that kind of stuff.

 And like looking at themselves and their needs, avoidants can be quite disconnected from their own feelings and needs. And that's because they tend to be so connected to and aware of other people's feelings and needs.

 Partially as a response, or partially As a result of some of that like hyper-vigilance, fearful avoidance tends to carry.

 Number two category two with different Traits- having unmet needs met, feeling seen, feeling like there's a depth of Connection, and somebody's like really Connecting to them as much as they're connecting to another person it's huge for fearful avoidance.

Also, things like novelty, adventure, fun because that tends to be a pretty Strong personality need for a lot of fearful avoidants, and at times when they feel safe in a relationship and like they can trust that can be a huge thing as well, a huge point of attraction as well in a Relationship.

And if you want to sort of finding out what tends to keep somebody coming back around, these are the parts in that Sort of category number three things that are Familiar.

And sometimes fearful avoidances can be challenging ones sometimes they are the ones are attracted at a Subconscious level or okay with and Comfortable and familiar with. 

People are overly critical people, who violate their boundaries. People who um sometimes have unhealthy Characteristics, ` because sometimes fearful avoidants as if they come from a lot of history of trauma can have sort of an unhealthy relationship to themselves. 

And as a result, they put up with things that that you know they wouldn't if they were a little bit more secure, hadn't been through so many traumas because of the fact that it's a subconscious comfort zone. 

So if that's you if that's the case Please make sure you're doing the Subconscious reprogramming of your core Wounds. That you're looking out for your boundaries. That you're being gentle and kind and compassionate to yourself and your internal dialogue.

And doing some of that deep inner work so you can change that subconscious Comfort zone in terms of the Relationship to yourself Thus you know perpetual propelling you I Guess would be the way to have healthier um relationships long Term and be attracted to people who are Going to treat you the way you deserve to be treated which is with fairness and kindness and compassion as With every other attachment style out.

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